Ugh, we get it already. From the director of two good Batman movies
comes a film that will obliterate your eardrums with deafening horn noises. When dream thief Dominic Cobb gets his toughest
assignment yet, he’ll assemble a team of experts, including this small boy who can suddenly learn to make
complex dream mazes after doodling,
a chemist who is literally the worst driver ever, and a sidekick whose only job is to explain the plot. “In a dream, you can cheat architecture into impossible shapes.” “Five minutes in the real world gives you an hour in the dream.” “In the dream state, your conscious defenses are lowered.” “You can’t wake up from within the dream unless you die.” “Raw, infinite subconscious. Nothing is down there –
except for whatever might have been left behind by someone sharing the dream who’s been trapped there before.” And yet, not even the characters in the movie
can figure out what’s going on.
“So what happens when we die?” “What’s a kick?”
“If this is my dream why can’t I control this?!” “Wait, who’s subconscious am I going into
exactly?” “I’m just trying to understand.”
“How could you understand?” “You don’t understand.” To get back his children, Cobb’s team will have to fight anonymous dream soldiers who have no idea how to hit anything with an automatic weapon, or duck. A
movie so complex, it requires intense concentration
at every moment – which is really difficult when this guy goes
over important plot points in a heavy accent. “My main competitor is an old man in poor
health. His son will soon inherit control of the corporation.” A supposedly original film that’s actually just The Matrix, but with creepier extras and unclear rules. Witness Leonardo Dicaprio fight his way through
any physical challenge, but struggle to squeeze through an alley way. Immerse yourself in the dreams of Christopher
Nolan, which apparently don’t include sex, flying,
or any other things normal people dream of.
A dream land where you can think of literally any weapon,
but for some reason only dream of small-to-medium sized guns.
Seriously, they couldn’t dream up a tank or something?
Starring Reonardo DiCaprio Indian Seth Rogen Fivehead The cast of The Dark Knight Rises George Takei The son from Third Rock from the Sun and a dreidel. INCEPTION. If Cobb couldn’t enter the country, wouldn’t
Michael Cain just fly the kids out to him? Ugh, whatever. Thanks for a great year, Screen Junkies!
Tell us what movie you want to see us cover in 2013.
Also leave us a comment below with something you’d like to hear me say in my amazing voice.